Today, In a Backwards World...

We had ourselves an adventure Friday. Unfortunately, said adventure pooped me right the heck out, so as soon as my brain catches up to the amount of awesome in Friday's story, I will be sharing it all with you. For now, just a few things that have nothing to do with each other.

I felt it okay to say all of these things at some point in the day.

- "I look like a man without a padded bra" needs to be the name of a song or a band.
- OMG! It should be a band that names a song that, too!

- That was like unicorns, and Care Bears, and puppy dogs with cute little bows in their hair.

- You're going to laugh at me, but the girl in this movie is so unbelievably gorgeous that I'm considering watching it.
- That's worse than it sounds, right?

I worry about me sometimes. There was nothing on, so I turned on this movie with the absolute worse description I could find, because you all know how I like myself some really shitty movies. When nothing is on, I find the movie with the worst description, but for the first time I think I found one that was just way too ridiculous for me. It was as follows, and I quote, "stranded friends encounter supernatural scarecrows at an isolated farmhouse." This from the girl who watched a movie with a description about a camp counselor with a sex change who murdered people. And laughed. I know, guys. And it's always the horror movies that are the funniest, but I digress.

I turned the scarecrow movie on to find it actually had good reviews online upon looking it up, which, despite the too stupid description, made me not want to watch it, but there was nothing else on. I was trying to convince myself to shut up and watch it, but the guys weren't cute. The girl was unbelievably gorgeous, though. I mean, I'm straight and I thought that. I still didn't really watch it because, as it turns out, the movie was actually pretty decent and I wasn't in the mood for decent, and, again, I'm also straight. If I were a guy, I would have watched it. Oh, and for the record, the girl bit it first in the movie, as in the first couple of minutes. The girl never bites it first. She was the only girl. I'm very confused.

- Call me stupid, but I just realized I'm sitting on the floor for no reason. There's room on the couch.

Stupid. There, I did it for you.

- Aww man, they're bleeping out all the good words in this movie. The girls just said, "He tried to me, so I kicked in him the."

- I've noticed if I hear a really bad country song sung by a male, I make fun of it, unless it's by Garth Brookes, then I respect it.

- When I die, I'm not going to come back and touch people.
- Move their things around and annoy them? Yes. Touch them? No.

I watched the cutest movie ever today. The description made it sound really stupid, but I decided to turn it on since it was on Hallmark. Look, the only bad movies I like are horror movies. Otherwise, the movies are just bad and not funny whatsoever. Color me pleasantly surprised when the movie actually ended up being the cutest movie I've seen since the last really cute movie I've seen.

After I realized that scarecrow movie really was too good for me to watch, I found some movie that I thought for sure would really suck. However, I watched about five minutes of it and realized it was based on actual events, so I immediately had to leave it on. It was a highly fictionalized version of it, highly, but this did actually happen.

In the late forties, a group of children on their way to school were struck and killed when their bus stalled on the tracks. The urban legend is that if you go to the tracks and put your car in neutral, it will roll back down the hill and away from the tracks and those are the children pushing you. I hate to burst everyone's bubble, but it's actually an optical illusion that the road is flat. It slopes downhill, but the foliage slopes uphill, making the road seem even. This was investigated thoroughly. You all know I love a good ghost story. Hell, they love me, too, but this one was purely gobbledygook, even though those poor children did pass.

What I like about the movie is that they added several different elements to it that actually made sense and worked with the original, true story, which made it interesting and was well done. Damn all three of you movies for faking me out with your bad descriptions and promos! I expected bad movies and you gave me good! I don't know what to think of this!

I was a victim of auto-correct today. I'd like to say the unfortunate victim, but I actually think it was a little fortunate because it made me laugh. Last night, Original Becky was telling me about an episode of Law and Order: SVU where this little kid thought his dad was sick because his mom said he had "dirty whore." He thought dirty whore was a disease. I love that kid. Anyway, Original Becky texted me to fill in me in on a mistake she made in presenting the storyline to me last night, and here's what happened.

* Ooh. Ooh. Okay, but still. Damn dirty shore disease.

Yep, my phone doesn't like the word whore, so it decided shore was better. Luckily, I thought I recovered from it quite nicely.

* Damn auto-correct. Too bad it didn't correct the first word to Jersey, because that show is a horrible disease.

Last, but certainly not least, I am going to answer Zoey's question left in the last post's comments. The Superbowl, or the pooperbowl, as I prefer to call it, is the end of the season football game. US teams play each other until the two best teams are left, and they face off against each other in what is called the Superbowl. It's like a religion here. I don't particularly like football, so I just plan to do things during it knowing no one else will be out. I also secretly hope they lose so I can actually hear the news the following day, instead of listening to a full newscast of coverage about all the Superbowl win parties. Oops, the secret's out.