Greta Hayley Says: Aunt Bev Is 29...Again

Why am I hiding, you ask? Well, it's a very special day here at Ruby Red Hearts!!! I can tell you what it is, but, *whispers* then you have to promise to jump up, throw your hands in the air and yell SURPRISE! when my very favorite person, other than my mommy and grandma, sees this.

HAPY BIRFDAY, ANT BEV!!!

Err...I mean...HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AUNT BEV!!!

I'm still little. Sometimes I need my mommy's help to spell things properly. It's okay, because I'm cute.

Now everyone jump out from your quiet spaces, throw your hands up and yell SURPRISE! Just like me. Ready?

1...2...3

SURPRISE!!!

For your birthday I was going to buy you a present, but I didn't have any monies, so I asked my mommy for monies and she asked me what I was going to buy you. I told her I was going to buy you a nice, hot man since you are newly single, and she said that was illegal and I could get arrested. I don't want to get arrested, so she suggested that we find you hot guys online and send you their picture. So, that's my present to you...a presentation of hot guys. Excuse me, hot, shirtless guys! (Eww, my poor puppy eyes!) But since I'm a puppy and only find other puppies hot, my mommy is going to help me put this together.

First she said we should start with Johnny Depp, because you like him. I think he's too old for you, though. You're only twenty nine, but mommy says you like older men, for some reason. *Sigh*

We looked at other older men together. And don't all of your readers start thinking dirty. I am just a little baby puppy and don't want corrupted. We thought we would add some flavor to your day and give you Shemar Moore. He's an old guy, too, but he's pretty hot, right, Aunt Bev? At least that's what mommy says. All these humans look alike to me!

Since I think older men are icky, I'm going to look for more age appropriate men for you.

How about Jensen Ackles? I'm a puppy, but even I know he's hot and more age appropriate for you. Plus, he's from Texas, and Texans like their doggies! That's what I'm told, at least.

And speaking of Texans, since you like older guys, but I still want to make sure you date someone age appropriate, how about Christian Kane? He's older, but not too old, and he's Texan, so he likes his puppy dogs!!! I'm a puppy dog! This works for me! And, mommy couldn't find a shirtless picture, so this was all the better for me. Eww, shirtless humans! I don't know how you people date those things!

Hrmm...I want to give you one more man for your birthday. Let me think some!

Okay, no, I'm out of men, so enjoy the ones that I sent you! Mommy says I can't go find him and make him date you, but remember, it's the thought that counts. Mommy also said this was such a "tough" blog to do, because she had to look at shirtless men.

Gee, you humans have some stupid sayings!